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Its early afternoon and I have been drinking for what seems to be a week straight with very little sleep. Im staying in Excalibur which for those who don't know is a giant castle full of chaos and fun. Today after many sleepless nights we found it to be a good idea to lay out by the pool and relax. All that really happened then was more alcohol being consumed only this time it was in the 115 heat. Great plan.

I had enough sound mind to head back to my room to shower away the feeling of booze, sweat, and shame to collect my thoughts and make a plan for the night. Post shower I am still in a dehydrated alcohol induced haze when my stomach makes a fierce noise. Whats the one thing I forgot to do over the last 12-15 hours? Eat. Now what.

I was not in the mood to spend more that 20 dollars on some swanky Vegas restaurant in the afternoon so I texted one of my friends back home for advice. The answer I got seemed perfect and after a quick google search on my phone saw that within the area of our hotel was an “In and Out Burger”. It seemed like a quick fix so I headed to ground level to navigate my way there.

In the distance I saw the sign behind our hotel and my first thought was “i can walk there with no problem”. And thats what I did. Fast forward 48 steps later in the Nevada desert heat and that is when I realized that this might have been a horrible idea. Still I track on until I hit my next obstacle…..going under a highway overpass with what looks to be a village of needle infested drug zombies. Head down and push through I thought. Thank god I wasn't raped or eaten as I darted through to my destination. 

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I enter and realize that I am hungry enough to eat my shoe which is what made me order what is known as a “double double”. This double cheeseburger had enough meat on it to feed a small herd of goats for sure. I choked down the burger fries and of course the worst decision I made, the strawberry shake. Lets just say that while I ate this meal it seemed to be the greatest food choice in the history of man kind. Fast forward two hours and I thought different.

After walking outside I realize that I’ve tempted the Vegas gods enough for one day and got on my lyft app for a ride back to the hotel. 10 minutes and 4 dollars later I arrived back to my hotel just in time for my friends to get back to the room from the pool. I was asked what I thought we should do that night and I basically said I was up to do whatever…….after I spend some quality time in our bathroom. 

Was “The Great Burger Walk” worth it in the end? Yes, and Yes

 


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